Discreps

When I used to work as a director for the TV station, we’d have a very brief meeting after the evening newscast. We’d go over everything that didn’t go as planned (breaking news, technical difficulties) and figure out where mistakes/discrepancies happened so we could prevent them in the future. The crew called this meeting “discreps”. Here are my discreps from the 3-week challenge:

- Wedding food tasting

Technically, I knew about this in advance. I had a few bites of meat, a little cheese, and I’m sure a few other bits of “outlawed” foods, but this was contained to the afternoon of the first day, and it was for my wedding!

- Peanuts

Whoops! Since I could basically only eat fruits, veggies, nuts, & seeds during Week #1, I assumed peanuts were legal. Then I remembered they were actually a legume & common allergen. I ate them 3 times in the course of the challenge.

- Pickles

Really? My tried & true standby diet food? Even YOU have added sugar? No excuse here. I read the label. It said “less than 2% high fructose corn syrup”. I was tempted. I rationalized it and ate some.

- Olive oil spray

I got sick of all of the oil in the recipes, so I tried this and realized even the can labeled “Olive Oil” contains propellant & lechithin.

- Bottled lemon juice/lime juice

I learned that “Real Lemon” is a half truth. The bottle actually contains lemon juice from concentrate, sodium benzoate, sodium metabisulfite, and sodium sulfite. But because nearly every recipe called for lemon juice – I gave in and allowed myself the cheat. A couple teaspoons here & there can’t hurt – right?

- Craisins

It is flippin’ impossible to find unsweetened dried cranberries. Impossible, I tell you! Even at the health food store, the best I could do was “cranberries infused with pineapple juice”. I did what I could, but I ended up eating about 2 tbs of Craisins, which contain sweetner. Blurg.

- Coconut/Oat Flour

You heard me – coconut flour & oat flour! What? You don’t have these in your cabinet? I got –­­­really curious after perusing recipes on vegan blogs. I found a vegan, gluten-free, no-sugar added cookie recipe! It used these two types of flour, plus some sunflower seed butter and a few eyedroppers full of stevia. All of these were WHOLE ingredients (only “coconut” and “oats” were listed on the flours’ ingredients), so the only processing was the milling. I ruled it legal and shared the cookies. Yum!

­­­­­What I’ve learned:

- Although I couldn’t do follow all of these restrictions long-term, I think I could totally go vegan OR gluten-free. In fact, we’re going to attempt to prepare a vegan/whole foods dinner weekly. Who wants kohlrabi??

- People who tell you green smoothies are delicious are lying liars. Lettuce and parsley do not a breakfast make. Even with pineapple added.

- The health food & specialty food stores in this town are awesome! I will definitely be doing more of my shopping at Open Harvest or Red Clover or Akin’s or Trader Joe’s!

- Roasting vegetables is super easy & Ben loves them! It’s so easy to throw some frozen cauliflower or sweet potato wedges or kale on a cookie sheet with some olive oil & whatever seasoning you want. This’ll be a habit that sticks.­­

- The garbage disposal in my sink doesn’t like to eat vegetables as much as I do. When fed too many, it spits them into the sink and dishwasher in rebellion. Yuck.

- Weird food alternatives & are not just for hippies and people with food allergies. Coconut flour, ­­almond milk, and stevia drops are all in my kitchen. I baked with sunflower seed butter. I drank coconut water and beet juice (Not mixed together. Gross.) I grilled bok choy & learned to love prunes as dessert.

- Failures –although sometimes inedible– are often funny. My no-egg-no-baking-soda falafel turned into an oily sesame soup…and the salvaged part wasn’t much better.

- You knew this already, but the interwebs rule. When I got tired of the challenge recipes, I was actually able to find vegan-whole-food-gluten-free-no-sugar-added recipes. I’ll never understand the people who rotate through only 7-10 go-to recipes. I love me some vegan blogs.

- I learned that I should get my thyroid checked out! After 3 weeks of cutting out calories & possible culprits, I’ve lost ZERO weight. I also just found out about some family history of thyroid problems. And since January is National Thyroid Awareness Month, why not? If it’s not to blame, at least now I know it’s not the chocolate, either J

- And finally – I learned that I have a phenomenal support system. Fo’ reals. Ben put up with my whining, my caffeine headaches, helped me prep meals, and dried when I washed. My future father-in-law saved the day when my vegetable peelings clogged the sink and dishwasher. My friend & lunch buddy Audrey actually jumped on board and started doing the cleanse w­­ith me! My other co-workers lent their juicer or gave me healthy snacks. My family offered to eat cleanse-friendly meals with me for Sunday night dinners. And Facebook friends, blog readers, fellow cleansers & and even Martha watchers J have been great cheerleaders & resources. Not to be melodramatic – after all, this was just a 3 week detox diet – but my friends & family pretty much rule. It made this a fun experiment.­­

So…what am I giving up next?

Home Stretch

Less than 2 days to go! I’d like to say that by now this feels like a normal diet which I could continue. That is not the case. The cravings have hit hard. My fiancé gets weirded out because I’ve started staring at him as he eats. It’s not my fault! He eats things like delicious chicken fingers and wheat dinner rolls and cheeseburgers! They smell soooo good.

Meanwhile, I’ve been forgoing many of the Week 3 recipes and experimenting instead. I cooked slabs of tofu in a little oil with homemade taco seasoning. OK, but not the same as tacos – especially with no tortillas. My fiancé promptly ate all of the tofu, but left the accompanying shredded veggies untouched. *sigh* Last night, I found this recipe for blueberry oatmeal & put it in the crockpot. It was awful, but not because of the recipe. It was awful because I didn’t FOLLOW the recipe. Not only did I not have all of the ingredients, but I didn’t have enough of the ingredients I had on hand….which led to some odd substitutions. And instead of baking it in a dry heat, I used my crockpot, for way too long. Long story short, I wound up with a purple tasteless goo. I choked down a bowl for breakfast and regretfully washed the rest down the sink. Blech.

I still wasn’t feelin’ the recipes today, so I dug through my cupboards & found a curry mix from the natural foods store. Unbelievably, the ingredients didn’t include any chemicals, sugar, dairy, or wheat! It’s supposed to be used with chicken, but I dumped it into the crock pot with a bag of frozen cauliflower. Fingers are crossed.

I’ll have fish, quinoa, & a salad at my parents’ for family dinner night. If I can pack some healthy stuff tomorrow at work, I’m home free! Runza, here I come! J

Pièce de résistance

I’ve resisted temptation for 16 days – 5 more to go! Here are the highlights:

I said “no” to:
- spaghetti at a family dinner
- homemade pumpkin cream cheese bars
- 10 takeout pizzas vying for the “best in town”
- Cookies from the Cookie Company in my department
- drinks and snacks at the bar
- Homemade cookies at Game Night
- jalapeno poppers fresh out of my oven
- A box of chocolates/cookies at a lunch meeting
- A giant jar of frosted cookies sitting 2 desks away
- the Cheese Nips and cinnamon ice cream that keep staring at me whenever I open my cupboard or freezer

…Plus countless images like this one on Pinterest. *drool*

I talked to:
Martha Stewart! The segment they did about the cleanse aired live on Tuesday, and they’ve posted it online: http://bit.ly/wISBTq One of the other “cleansers”, Erin, had already lost 14 pounds as of Tuesday! There is a chance (albeit tiny) that we’ll be asked to make a return appearance for an update on the cleanse. I doubt it will happen, but I’ll be sure to post if Martha calls!

I got picked for:
a random drug test at work. I’m pretty sure that’s the cleanest urine that facility’s ever seen. EVER.

I scheduled a:
massage at a local spa! I’ve been stressed and I still haven’t cheated on the cleanse. I’ve earned a non-food reward!

I lost my:
mp3 player! It’s been missing since a gym visit last week, and I’ve searched high & low. I really miss my workout playlists!

In the crockpot: Kale, white bean, & potato stew
In the fridge: Toasted coconut muesli

Detox Weight Loss

I am 2/3 done with the Whole Living 21-Day Detox Challenge! I’ve already gone 2 weeks without processed foods or beverages, added sugar, dairy, gluten, caffeine, or alcohol. Several people have asked me if I’m going to stick with it when I’m done. My answer: Every time I do something like this, it introduces me to new things (yoga, rutabaga, Open Harvest) and helps reinforce the healthy habits I already have (tracking what I eat, getting more activity, cooking healthier meals). This is a cleanse, not a long-term diet, so I never intended to stick to this as a permanent diet. That being said, I have a whole new respect for vegans, paleo dieters, and whole/raw food devotees! It takes a lot of planning, preparation, and my least favorite - dish washing - to eat this way. And yes...I will still drink Coke Zero.

When I first started this cleanse, I said that I didn’t expect to lose weight. Well, I’ve been averaging 1130 calories/day (yes – I actually calculated the past 10 days!). Well guess what? I haven’t lost a dang pound! I thought I’d lost a couple, but when I double checked, it was just wishful thinking. I didn’t embark on this detox as a weight-loss challenge, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed. The other women doing this challenge have reported losing weight, and I’ve been staving off cravings and meticulously counting calories for 2 weeks. I know this is great for my body, but I sure wish there was a visible result!

Dishwashing and waistlines aside, this has been a good experience. I have proven to myself that I have a lot more willpower than I thought. At the risk of sounding like a holistic weirdo, I really do feel more in tune with my body. I can feel when I’m not getting enough protein in my diet. I can better distinguish when I’m craving something, when I’m dehydrated, and when I’m actually hungry. I’ve also trained myself into healthier portion sizes. I still fight naps like a cranky toddler, but I succumb to it a couple times a week now. J

Tonight: Salmon, gym, and an early bedtime

Tomorrow: Martha, eggs, & non-gluten grains!! I love me some quinoa!

Martha & a Mouthful of Bugs

I’ll be on The Martha Stewart Show live via webcam on Tuesday. The producer tells me it airs live, but I’m not sure that’s the case in my area. The three “weeks without” I’ve been doing are taken directly from the 21-Day Detox Challenge in Whole Living Magazine….a Martha Stewart magazine. As I’ve been making recipes, I’ve been following Whole Living’s blog posts and Facebook page. One afternoon, they asked their Facebook followers if any of the 21-day cleansers would be interested in talking about their experience on The Martha Stewart Show. I replied with my contact information & received a call about an hour later. The next day, I received a laptop, webcam, and microphone that they’d overnighted for me to use (not to keep…). Lucky me, I work at a TV station, so I’m using the studio at work to do the segment. I won’t have to miss work, and I’ll have great lighting J

We did an equipment test & quick run-thru on Friday, and everything went smoothly for me. The only bad news? The rehearsal is at 7:15am on Tuesday (ouch!) before the live show at 9:30am. So – if I look really tired or sound like Frankenstein, now you’ll know why.

My kitchen is in a constant state of disaster - just as I finish a load of dishes, I have to start another one and hand wash another sink full of them. Plus, my sink is backed up (and no, that's not a detox euphemism...), so I guess I haven't been being careful enough about all of the vegetable peelings going down the garbage disposal.

Today, I made my first –and long overdue- visit to the Open Harvest co-op grocery store in Lincoln. I’d heard nothing but glowing reviews about it, and it –mostly- lived up to the hype. First, the service was incredible. I knew the woman who was handing out samples because we’d met through a couple shoots for work. My cashier was the friendliest, most helpful guy ever. Second, they’re super green. I expected this, but it was cool to see people bringing in their own containers and leaving with reusable bags & boxes (you get a discount for doing so). Thirdly, I found some of the weird ingredients for the cleanse that I couldn’t find ANYWHERE else! Delicata squash, miso soup powder, hemp seed, and tons of no-sugar added organic dried fruit. But it wasn’t all good news…I came home and mixed up some of the dried fruit with nuts to make some cleanse-friendly trail mix. I had eaten a couple of handfuls when I noticed ANTS in the jar!!! I am quite sure I ate a few of those little guys, and they’re NOT on the detox menu! haha That being said, I’ll take my chances & revisit Open Harvest. – but I’ll be double checking my fruit.

Currently craving:

- chocolate

- Amigo's soft taco

- Sam Adams

A Religious Experience

Today kicked off Week #2 of my three weeks without processed foods, added sugar, gluten, dairy, caffeine, and alcohol. If this is a “detox”, then a lot of the foods I like are poisonous. J

The detox symptoms are gone, and I’m feeling good! How good? Yesterday, my work day flew by, I got a root canal, worked out at the gym, ran errands, and STILL stuck to the cleanse. Yeeaahh! This afternoon, the junk food cravings hit hard, but I stayed far away from the vending machines.

While I’ve been eagerly awaiting Week 2 foods (never in my life have I been so excited for lentils!), I didn’t cook last night, and I didn’t have time to make breakfast/lunch today, so I fell back onto a Week 1 smoothie and butternut squash soup. Tonight, I celebrated my Week 1 victory with a mani/pedi. Then drove straight to the grocery store and made a beeline to the butcher’s counter for some wild-caught salmon. My dinner was a religious experience: salmon, half an avocado, red onion, cilantro, grape tomatoes, and some steamed Brussels sprouts.

Plus, my friend Audrey decided that she’s going to do the 21-day challenge, too! Hooray for at-work support!